Clichés become clichés for a reason. Tell us about the last time a bird in the hand was worth two in the bush for you.
One such cliché in Indian society is, Glorifying arranged marriages. Though it is not an idiom or a phrase but it is a state of mind in our society.
Arranged marriages are viewed as a tradition over the ages in Indian Society. Though love marriages are common now-a-days and it did happen in the past but love marriages are yet to become a cultural part. I do not have anything personal against arranged marriages but I just don’t feel overwhelmed with joy when arranged marriages get so much praises over love marriages.
The basis of arranged marriage is built upon the fact that both the bride and the groom should belong to the same or comparable caste. Otherwise marriage is a strict no no. First comes the caste, love comes afterwards in case of arranged marriage.
Though the basis of love marriage is “love,” it is still looked down upon by many elders here in India. “You know what, my friend’s daughter got married with a guy who belongs to a lower caste,” a very common topic of discussion that I have heard so many times.
Some are even more creative finding faults in love marriages, “Your son had a love marriage? See, I warned you earlier that he is seeing a girl. My son is so obedient unlike yours. He will get married according to my wish.” In their view a love marriage brings disgrace to the family. They try to make us feel that indeed love marriage is a matter of shame whereas arranged marriages are the reason to be proud. They give lectures on caste and the ancient culture and the beneficial reasons to get married inside the caste. They think it is their responsibility to find their children a life partner. They even try to influence the parents who do not feel the intense urge to control their children in choosing their life partner.
I chose to get married to the person I love. It was hard for both of us, still we were determined to get over the adversities. Our parents were reluctant at first but finally they supported us. They disregarded the bad things that others had to say about our marriage.
It is high time that people stop listening to these fallacies and move on because the basis of the marriage should be love, not any single other thing. It is okay to have an arranged marriage inside same caste but it is also okay to have an inter caste love marriage. In fact, more and more inter caste marriages will help the future generation to be free from the thoughts of caste and creed. After all there is no need to follow the rule, “When in Rome, do as the Romans do.”
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