The term Long Distance Relationship (LDR) is not fancy anymore in this Hi-tech age. More and more people are getting into a relationship that is long distant. There are many unmarried couples as well as married couples who stay miles apart from each other. With greater distance comes the greater challenges. Remember distance is a test and you have to pass that to get your love. Here are some of the things that one can do while in such a relationship to make it work. Though I am writing from a girl’s perspective, the ideas are gender neutral.
If you love someone deeply and he stays far away from you, it’s obvious that you are going to miss him badly. The fact that you can not meet him anytime soon, adds to the woes. Sometimes it gets really unbearable, when you feel low and just want your partner by your side to cheer you up. Sometimes you miss him on special occasions like your birthday or the anniversary date of your relationship. You want to be happy in certain occasions but you feel like you can not be happy to your fullest as he is not with you physically. Sometimes you also feel that your partner do not miss you at all as he rarely admits that. This makes you further unhappy. So, what to do in such situation?
You have to think differently. You have to learn to be happy without your partner. You may wish to spend the evening on your birthday with your partner but if that doesn’t happen do not sulk. Instead celebrate it with your friends and family. Later you can share those happy moments with him. Only thinking about him and missing him will do no good to you. Rather think about what you are going to do when he comes to visit you.
If your partner does not say that he misses you all the time, do not think that he is not missing you. Definitely he misses you but he won’t tell you. Boys and girls think differently. We tend to talk about the things that makes us unhappy in order to cope up with the stress but boys prefer not to talk about the things that they can not change at the specific moment. Try to stay positive and also help him to stay positive. Staying positive will help you to stay in love.
MAKE IT A RULE TO STAY IN TOUCH
Try to spend as much as time together via phone, text messages or video chat. The more time you will spend together the more strong your relationship will be. It’s not possible to devote same amount of time daily but make it a rule to call at least once a day.
SHARE YOUR DAILY DETAILS WITH YOUR PARTNER
Share every details of your day while you talk to your partner. Ask about each others family and friends. Talk about each others childhood and communities. It will help you to have a better understanding for each other.
TRY HEALTHY DISCUSSION TO SORT OUT DIFFERENCES
It is natural that at any point, differences of thought will arise. Try to sort out that by discussing the matter. If something is bothering you then do not avoid it for rectifying in future. If something is bothering you and you need a change state that clearly but never ever start whining. This will eventually lead to a heated altercation and the problem will not be solved. Instead try something like “I am really bothered about this matter” and express your concerns. If possible, also tell him how you will like to solve the problem. Your partner will both listen and try to sort out the matter and you will be amazed to see the power of healthy discussion. Most of the differences can be sorted out if approached in a right manner.
Boys simply hate whining and as soon as they identify your whining tone they will shut off their ears and will not listen to you even if you say the right thing. So, next time be careful and practice to be articulate.
GIVE UTMOST PRIORITY TO EACH OTHER
When you are in a LDR you have to make some sacrifices and give priority to each other over anything else. For example your partner wants to talk to you whole day after a very busy week and you have plans to go to a friend’s house. In that case you have to cancel your plan to visit your friend and spend the day talking to your partner. Try to think it in this way, you had a very busy week and you want to spend the weekend with your partner, but your partner plans to go for a hike. How would you feel about that? You got it right!
Prioritizing each other over anything else will make your relationship even stronger and both of you will feel loved.
INSPIRE EACH OTHER
Share the goals and ambitions in your life and help each other to achieve that. Help each other to dream bigger. Be an inspiration for each other to achieve something great together.
PlAN FOR FUTURE
You should plan about the future of your relationship together. It will help you to believe that both of you are serious about the relationship and want to take it to the next level. Plan about the things you will do when you are together. You both can plan about your marriage also if you feel so.
TRUST EACH OTHER
The basis of any relationship is built upon trust. Have that trust always. Do not suspect any thing wrong just because you are in a LDR. There is a reason why you chose to be in a relationship with this certain person and that is, you can trust him. If not then you should not be in the relationship anyway. So let the trust prevail in your relationship.
AND ONE FINAL THING
If your long distance relationship is successful and eventually you get married then it’s obvious how strong your relationship was. In future you may have problems in your married life but always remember, together you sailed through the thunderstorm and succeeded. Need I say more?